Permission to be Lazy

foot up

The other evening Monty & I attended an event where the guest speaker was meant to inspire the audience. We weren’t sure of the subject matter heading into it, but the talking points and leave behind messages were something like this.

“Success is achieved by hard work”, “If you have dreams, then dream bigger”, “Make lots of money now, here are the ways how, then later enjoy your life and family”, “I am my own destiny”.

The speaker was received with roaring applause from a fully engaged audience.

However, I left feeling a little unsettled. Maybe it’s my aging wisdom, or life experiences, but in general I disagreed with many of the points and the overall message. It also left me feeling guilty, that somehow I wasn’t doing enough. It didn’t motivate or inspire me like it did the others.

I don’t know if there were others that felt the same way, but if there were, here are some thoughts I’d offer in response.

“Time is the most valuable thing in this world, treat it like the precious thing it is”, “Follow your passions and dreams, whatever that dream may be”, and “money will follow if that’s important to you” “Surround yourself with people who love, support you and intellectually challenge you. It is they who will help you achieve your dreams” “Enjoy the important simple things in life, they don’t cost anything”.

hand on hair

Lately I’ve been reading and following the recommendations of the book ‘Always Hungry? Conquer Food Cravings and Retrain Fat Cells’, by Dr David Ludwig (recommended by my doctor). The book’s principles give equal weight to the importance of the balanced diet, joyful exercise, meditating, joyful activities, rest and sleep.

So I say to you, and so does Dr Ludwig, you have permission to be lazy. No matter your age, or your career or whatever, it is absolutely OK to just rest. Read, meditate, nap, yoga, sip some wine, walk in nature; let your body and mind recover. Prioritize it however you possibly can. I know it’s hard. I know most people have jobs and families to care for, but it’s important. Rest has helped with my own health improvement, my own peace of mind, and has been a great source of inspiration.

Some of my best ideas, in fact most of my best ideas, have come to me when I was relaxing. I should write a book “The Bathtub Chronicles; Genius Rising from the Bubbles”. Some of my thoughts from the tub are silly, creative and whimsical. Some thoughts are beautiful life reflections, and some are ideas for new ways of thinking or behaving. Bath-time, or lazy time gives me a chance to work through all of the information I consume everyday.

I have also made some adjustments that are helping me rest my mind and body more:

  • Turning off my devices after 7pm, and one day a week
  • Reading more books of all genres, not reading crappy gossip magazines
  • Cooking most of our meals
  • Responding to text, voice, email when I can, and not feeling guilty about it. My goal is to have my message alert tone no longer cause me to recoil with anxiety
  • Look at things to do as ‘is this a hell yes?’, if not then no
  • Looking at things I own as ‘does this bring me joy?’ if not then goodbye, perhaps someone else will derive joy from it

So there’s something to say for the merit of both life approaches. But I think the magic lies somewhere in the middle. Working on that balance is what we should all be striving for. I know when I was in my 20’s and 30’s I certainly could have been that guest speaker we just saw. And maybe it’s easier for me to preach balance when I don’t have to worry about how I’m getting my next meal on the table. But I can say I do know that the happiness and the joy lies in the middle somewhere. So I dare ya to be lazy. Pdub xo

hopeful

What I’m Wearing:

Shearling: Helmut Lang

Long Scarf: Knit by my mom

Floral Dress: Raquel Allegra

Boots: Frye

Fingerless Gloves: Helmut Lang

 

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Comments

    • Katherine
    • January 18, 2017
    Reply

    Love, love, love this post. I feel the exact same way about quotes. Quotes are always: give 150% …or work hard and you’ll be rewarded. Where are the quotes for the work-a-holics who need balance desperately? A quote Like: give 75% and keep 15% for yourself. I never needed a quote or inspirational message to get me to work hard…it’s the lack of balance that can really destroy the hard work I have put in in the end.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for supporting being lazy and resting. I will do this today and I thank you for the permission ❤️

      • Pamela
      • January 18, 2017
      Reply

      Love the ‘work 75% and keep 15% for yourself’. So good. I’m drinking tea in spirit with you today 🙂

    • Anonymous
    • January 18, 2017
    Reply

    Wonderful insight. At 72, I have found the things in life that make me happy and will follow them everyday. Being with family, friends and myself are what give me pleasure today. Reading, learning new information and participating in educational and fun activities keep me young at heart. Being “lazy” is my time for myself and those for whom I care. It is what keeps me healthy, both mentally and physically.
    I lift my glass of wine to being “lazy” for the rest of my days.

    • Lynda
    • January 18, 2017
    Reply

    Pamela,
    The post above is from me. As you can see, seniors and technology do not always meld.

      • Pamela
      • January 20, 2017
      Reply

      Cheers to you my amazing friend. Spectacular lady you are

    • Tracy Buglass
    • January 18, 2017
    Reply

    Dear friend…you are an inspiration. I am so blessed to know you. I am in total agreement with your philosophy and look forward to getting better at rest.

      • Pamela
      • January 20, 2017
      Reply

      Same here and same to you Tracy. You deserve rest, and pampering 🙂 xo

    • Elizabeth Moreland
    • January 18, 2017
    Reply

    Interesting post. I, too, could have been that speaker in my 30s but now find myself at a point in my life when I want to do what I want… when I want and am constantly re-evaluating what that is. Relaxing is certainly a big part of it. Work/my business is less of a priority. But, much of that is due to the fact that in my 30s and 40s, I put the time in. Lots of time. Making money was important to me as I knew I wanted to relax when I hit my 50s and enjoy the fruits of my labor. During my hard working years, I listened to many speakers like the one you describe. They helped me stay focused and motivated. But I also listened to many speakers that help me accomplish this rather than just motivate me. Successful entrepreneaurs, marketing & business experts, wealth gurus, etc. All had messages that I needed to hear. I then spent a good amount of time figuring out how their messages fit into my goals at that time as well as my future life goals. Because of the time I spent listening, planning and implementing in my 30s & 40s, I can confidently relax now that I am in my 50s. I guess the message I am trying to convene is I completely agree with your post but also understand the importance of the message the speaker delivered. As many parables teach us, as well as nature, there is a time for both! As always Pam, enjoy your blog!

      • Pamela
      • January 20, 2017
      Reply

      Yes great points and great perspective, I agree with you. Thanks for commenting Liz. Hope you are well

    • Anonymous
    • January 26, 2017
    Reply

    Love it Pam, great read and perspective!

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